Friday, December 28, 2007

Gearing Up For the New Year

I am planning for the new year. I usually enjoy that task, but this year I am feeling overwhelmed. I am anxious about starting school back up with the baby in tow. If you really knew me, you would know that something like this wouldn't normally bother me at all. I have worked school around much larger distractions than a sweet little baby.

I suspect that part of my anxiety is due to the fact that my house is a disaster. I am not just saying that, this place is trashed. I am embarrased to have anyone over, but unexpected guests have arrived the last 2 days. And I felt as tall as an ant. I don't know what kind of character flaw I have that has allowed this to happen......and don't try to tell me that I can be excused because of the new baby.....this place was in bad shape before then. And pregnancy wasn't an excuse either because it wasn't all that clean before that. I admit it....I am a messy person, who happens to live with people who are also messy and don't care about the results. I am also lazy (which is a main character fault that I need to work on with God's grace).

I also need to start working on healthier eating. So far that isn't going well, as I have been eating every BAD thing that I come into contact large quantities. And I feel bad about it. Just not bad enough to STOP.

I fear that maybe I am depressed. I know that a good dose of exercise would probably help my outlook on life, but I don't have the energy to even think about that. I need to seek out time with God and His word, but I crave sleep so badly that I don't get around to it. I need to clean, but I want to snuggle with my baby. I struggle to see where to drag myself out of this hole that I have created.

So I am getting ready to go to God in prayer and ask his assistance in all of this. I am going to seek out his promises in my life. I am going to ask for help to conquer my lazy tendencies and for guidance in my housekeeping duties. I will listen for his leading in our homeschooling schedule. I am grateful that God is available to me through his son Jesus Christ.

Send on the New Year......I think that I will be ready to face it!

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